Tag: pain

Pain

My pain and I are best friends.

ExtravagantLeave a comment

It strikes me every day
hits me, destroys me and seeks,
seeks my own annihilation

I used to pray,
I used to pray for the pain to stop
to let me be, and leave my suffering,
dwindling rotting away soul,

But prayers are null,
nothing, pointless,
fruitless, they are emptiness.
they are an emptiness,
that I know very well,
a place of existence that suits me best.

Just like the nothingness of prayers,
the pain will always linger on my back,
crawl in my guts, and leave me stranded,
Stranded on the shores of nihilism,
the shores of no return, the sand of doubt.

I am one with my pain.

Staring

Staring at nothingness, realizing I am nothing.

ExtravagantLeave a comment

Staring at the ceiling above me,
Pale and white, the paint shedding off
I pause, and stare
Drowning my sorrows every night,
Sitting on this old wooden bed,
Eyes fixated upon the same illuminated screen
The realization of failure,
The realization of nothingness,
The realization of woes and sadness
I look up again at the ceiling,
Trying to find some purpose,
Maybe just maybe, the white old paint has the answers
The paint, the screen, the whirling thoughts
Thoughts of love and desire
Thoughts of pain and heartache to come
There’s no escape…
I wish I had nothing. Nothing would be better,
Better than living among lies
Nothing would suite me just fine now,
As I am nothing,
And nothing I shall be.

Shame

A poem about the hardships and the curse of life.

Extravagant2 Comments

I can never walk away
I don’t want to be the lone stroller,
sashaying along the barren lands,
with feelings of guilt and shame
slowing me down,
like a thousand stones
laying still on my heart

Like a blustery whirlwind
It hit me along with crackling hail,
A deluge of heavy rain,
thunderous roars of fulminating bolts,
I shivered and scampered,
like a cast away duckling,
searching for solace and acceptance

Dreams of a pellucid sky,
shining down rays of sunshine
as I hurry away from the shame
that inflicted my dreaded soul,
like a curse of Cain,
haunting my conscious existence,
til end times.